The black college experience is one that is memorable for a variety of different reasons. One of the most exciting factors about college life is the social scene. Many young adults look forward to meeting a variety of people and potentially forming a close relationship without the close supervision of a parent or other authority figure. However, with every privilege, comes responsibility. Below are some elements that should be considered when dating at the collegiate level. The following are three important factors that you should know when embarking on the dating scene in college.
1. Be Yourself – This may be easier said than done, but you will find that it will really work in your favor if you develop a sense of self and know who you are when it comes to anything specifically college dating. All too often people try to front and change themselves in order to attract others. This may work in a few situations, but in most cases it becomes difficult to perpetuate a facade in order to keep someone interested. Thus, the best thing that you can do while dating in college is to simply be yourself. Being yourself will allow people to get to know the real you. Furthermore, you will not have to always worry about trying to impress someone because it is difficult to forget how to be you. Of course being yourself presupposes knowing yourself. If you don’t really know yourself yet, take some time to invest in doing so before investing time and energy in knowing someone else.
2. Be Safe – While college dating can be very fun, it is very important for you to be as safe as possible when meeting new people. There have been many incidences where young adults have encountered some very precarious situation while dating. Incidences such as date rape and stalking are a lot more common than people realize, and it is very important to take steps for dating safely. If you feel uncomfortable going on a date alone with someone it may best to suggest a double date or dates in public places where there are plenty of people around until you feel comfortable being alone with a person that you are dating. Alcohol and illegal drugs are often the contributors of trouble in dating relationships. Keeping a clear head that is unclouded by controlled substances is part of the pathway toward college dating success.
3. Have Fun and Learn – The college experience is about obtaining an education, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t have some fun. The college environment will introduce you to so many different types of people and because of this there is the unique opportunity to meet, associate and date people who you may not have ever thought of dating. Although some people may want to establish long-term romantic relationships while in college, most people are just simply looking to have fun and to learn your likes and dislikes. Use this time to figure out what you want and what you don’t want in a mate.
4. Keep Sex in Context – Many potentially positive relationships have been ruined by the premature introduction of sex into the relationship. Hopping in bed before you really even know the person places too great of an emotional burden on the relationship before it is mature enough to bear such a demanding load. Once sex enters the picture, everything changes. Making friends is for dating and making love is for marriage.
In all, the college dating experience is one that is very unique and very enjoyable at the same time. It is important to remember to be safe, be yourself and have fun, learn and keep the sex in the right context. Decide to get the most from your dating experience while in college.